Tuesday, January 31, 2012

Hey, prick, drop dead!

The Almighty Asshole; he is a relatively rare bird, but a smelly, flightless, rancid one, nonetheless.


I know I've written about them before, but I was recently confronted with a prick so prickly that you want to see him beaten by 100 angry birds.  Oh, a sight that would be.  Here's a guy who seeks out those who may be doing something well or tasting some success or, Gawd forbid, may believe something HE doesn't believe and then he attacks.  He attacks who they are, how little schooling they've had, how little they are contributing to the world, how unliked or unpopular or fat or ugly they are, how their religious or political beliefs are wrong and stupid, and he slices hard with these knives.  He himself is a sad person.  He's mad if you're tall, successful, handsome, or liked.  He's not attractive to the ladies and doesn't have a lady.  He's got bad posture and sounds like a teenage female when he speaks, often lispy and mumbling.  He has no speaking skills, no social skills and believes he knows it all.  He believes that whites are superior to all, and he is superior to all whites.  He brags and brags that he has a degree in physics and that he is a builder (all bow now to his Greatness, please)..

It's hard to answer when one asks how he became this way; I can personally testify that he has BEEN this way for at least 22 years, since I knew him in high school.  It's funny; I had very little to do with him, at all, but I knew his reputation and how hated he was.  One day, in football practice, coach had me playing QB because the team we were coming up against had a really tall QB and I am really tall so he wanted me to play the position for the rest of the defense to understand how he might pass over top of them, etc.  So one play, I'm running around, couldn't find a receiver, and ran back across the back of the scrimmage line still looking; no receiver, so I knew I had to bust through the line of scrimmage and get some yardage.  Right before I picked my spot in the messy line of scrimmage to run through, I noted this prick not blocking for me but chatting with one of his friends, absolutely unconcerned that the ball was still in play, I then had 7 guys chasing me, and that his job was to push the defense away to make a hole for me to run through.  The choice was obvious; I ran square into has back at no less than 20 mph, absolutely flattening him as I watched his head snap back (admitting now that I enjoyed it) and I knocked over a linebacker, who caught my ankle and I spun around, bumbling for another 5 or 10 yards before falling.  That's the speed and intensity I had when I hit the line; when I hit him, that I would have never had were it not for the rage that snapped in my mind when I saw him chatting.  Why didn't he like me then?  I don't know.  I guess because I was tall.  I had never done anything to him.

Fast forward a couple of decades, and he decides to jump out of nowhere, attacking my books, calling them "shitty fiction."  Ohhhhhhhh.  My friends, suffice it to say that I didn't have to defend myself.  My friends and readers jumped all over him like piranha on a chicken leg.  He was left hollow by the end of the exchange which took the form of a series of comments on a friend's Facebook status.  He tried to backpedal and say that I (Kevin) was intelligent and that maybe I wrote well (and you can goddam guarantee that it made him SICK to have to do this, just to try to not make any more enemies than he had already made) but my friends and I were not buying it.

My point is this; the guy I'm talking about is real, and I know two other men like him.  First, you can identify them by a few common traits.  They are mean, they define their success and in some cases, they define themselves, by earnings.  Money made.  Next, they have very closed minds socially.  The do not tend to respect women, but especially tend to disrespect anybody who isn't their own race.  They are not open to understanding that life differs outside of their "county lines," that not everybody thinks like them, and that even those that don't think like them could actually be right.  They won't ever, ever, ever believe that.  They are right, and nobody else isThey are kings in their world.  It could come from parents who made them believe they were kings, or a wife/girlfriend who was subservient to them and over a course of years made them feel like kings.

First, I'd like to offer my words to them; words I'll happily stand behind when speaking to them in person.  Matter of fact, if one of them should see this blog entry and care to print it out and confront me with it, I'll read it to them, while looking at them, and I'll put special emphasis on this next message that I'm giving to them:

  • "You are an asshole.  A prick.  You are as small as you think you are big.  You set out to hurt people and elevate yourself.  Nobody likes you.  People like me despise you.  Your ego is nauseating and nobody likes that.  You are nothing, and nobody.  I know this because what makes somebody into somebody is the willingness to give, to be humble, and to care about others.  You, on the other hand, are a low-life asshole who thinks the world revolves around you.  You are a piece of shit that the world will do better without.  You are the type of person that makes me appreciate good people all that much more, because you are not good people.  You, child-like adult, are an asshole, and you will live and die as an asshole.  You have no class.  You are angry at the tall/good-looking/popular/loved people.  Stay out of my life and out of my way so that I don't have to find a creative way to make you not be in my life or in my way.  Carry your poison off into the darkness; carry your own insecurities and feelings of failure that cause you to act like you do off into the remote corners of the world where the rest of us won't be bothered by your selfish, childish, idiotic behavior."  

That's what I'll say, to their faces.  Feel free to pass this blog on to any that might need it read to their face.

Why this blog entry?  Because, as my close friends know, I seek to inspire, and I seek to inspire in areas where we're all looking and thinking that something should be done, and I'm usually one of the few that will jump up early and call for action, and I will always do this in favor of good people; of those that give to others, those that do not believe they are better than everybody else--ultimately to those that realize that no matter how bad your life is, there is no good reason to attack others unless they are either attacking you or attacking other innocent people.  So, please, don't just read this; believe it, and stand up against assholes and bullies.  Stand hard, and with confidence.  You can do it if you choose, and you will succeed.


  1. Grrr - Sorry you had to go through something like that, but I can't think of a better way you could have handled it. I too had a runin with such a creature. I friended a man recommended to my by another friend. He reviewed books and I asked if he'd be willing to review mine. One day, a friend of his made a political comment that I disagreed with. Now I know no two people will agree on all things and politics is particularly prickly on that, but I don't mind a good debate. I honestly didn't expect the name calling and low cuts I got in return simply because I disagreed. I quickly unfriended the man, not expecting to get my review or ever hear from him again. I did indeed get the review and it was alright but I doubt he actually read the book. At least he didn't carry his political view over to his book reviews, or maybe he never connected me to that disagreement.

  2. Well if he did separate the two, that's amazing because most people aren't that professional. More likely, my gut tells me, is that he didn't connect you to the disagreement. Either way, I wish you the very best in your writing career; there is enough room for all of us! Thank you for the comment.